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 Life
issues: All That Glistens
Overcoming setbacks
Pa deals with a double blow
In the episode "All that Glistens,"
Pa had pinned all his hopes on finding gold.
When his dreams were dashed and his wife
tragically died, Pa lost all self-respect
and turned to the bottle for comfort. From
there it was a downward slope for Pa and
the kids.
Dealing with setbacks is something we all
have to do. It takes great character to
overcome these barriers.
Things can often turn out for the better
as a result of a failure or disappointment.
Pa missed out on finding gold but found
something much more valuable - "the
real gold is the love that’s all around
you." He was thankful for the things
he still had. He decided to stop beating
himself up about it and moved on to his
next goal.
Missing out – a rough guide
Can you think of a time when you tried hard
to achieve something but missed out or dealt
with a disappointment?
How did you feel?
Did you
a. Take it upon
yourself and think it was all your fault?
b. Talk about it with somebody else?
People deal with disappointment in different
ways. The main thing is not to bottle it
up or let the experience "burn you."
As Pa showed us, this behaviour can turn
out to be self-destructive.
If you have a major setback here are some
suggestions.
- React to
it, don’t keep it inside you. Cry
or talk about it to a friend. Get things
off your chest.
It might be tempting to seek solice in
a huge tub of ice cream, alcohol or drugs.
Although they could null the pain for
a short time, you’ll end up feeling
the worse for it.
The best thing to do is to deal with it.
Like Jess said "It’s time for
action."
- Given time
you should revisit the disappointment
and ask yourself some questions ( it might
be worth talking to a friend at this stage
as well)
Why did things turn out the way they did?
Did I have any bearing over the result?
 If
you didn’t and it was something or
someone else that determined the outcome,
there is probably very little you could
have done about it but take what you can
from it.
If you did have some bearing over the result,
it is important not to beat yourself up
over it.
Use it as a learning experience
Work out some particular things that you
will do differently next time.
Remember all those well-known quotes –
"There is no success like failure"
"We learn wisdom from failure much
more than success."
Appreciate and enjoy the good things which
still surround you.
Then move on to the next challenge!
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